It’s a pleasure to hear devotional thoughts from Autumn Pearson this week! Take a moment and stop by the contributors page to learn more about her.
In honor of Mother’s Day, I would love to tell you about my lovely mother who, among innumerable other things, taught me the importance of friendship. Throughout my mother’s life, she has lived by and taught the mantra: “A stranger is just a friend you have not met yet.” She talks readily and easily to most people she meets.
Strangers are treated like the friends they might soon prove to be, such as her high school best friend that she still talks to regularly. Mom met Sue the first day of ninth grade because Sue was standing by herself. This life-long friendship came about because Mom followed her mantra and applied a rule she encouraged in her children—look for those who are standing alone to reach out to first. Mom never had to be the center of attention, but she was great at giving attention to those often overlooked.
Even deep friendships begin simply—with friendliness—but require more to continue. According to Ephesians 4:32, that initial friendliness should be accompanied by kindness, a tender heart, and forgiveness. Friendship requires something of us; and, although I have learned that some friends might be for just a season, I do not want to be too quick to let friendships slide out of my life because friendship is so very important. The great C. S. Lewis in The Four Loves said, “To the Ancients, Friendship seemed the happiest and most fully human of all loves; the crown of life and the school of virtue.” Friendship holds such an important role because of what friends do in our lives.
Friends stay loyal.
Proverbs explains, “A friend loveth at all times and a brother is born for adversity” (Proverbs 17:17). Loyalty remains in place even when the bonds of friendship might be tested. We see this loyalty in the friendship of Jonathan with David. Jonathan protects David even though this protection means not inheriting the throne from his father.
Friends improve us.
This improvement can come in a couple of ways. First, would be the sharpening discussed in Proverbs 27:17: “Iron sharpeneth iron; so a man sharpeneth the countenance of his friend.” If countenance refers to a person’s face, friendship helps us with our outlook on life. Friends are often sounding boards. I cannot count the number of miles I have walked or ran with friends discussing what the Lord is doing in our lives.
Second, the improvement comes in a less comfortable way. Proverbs 27:6 actually says that a friend can bring a wound. Perhaps this wound comes when a friend redirects our countenance or when a friend points out a wrong that we have done. Either way, wounds from friends can be trusted because they are “faithful,” coming from an interest in truth. A friend only wounds when his friend veers from the right way.
Third, improvement comes in the mundane, the work of life. Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 explains that “two are better than one; for they have a good reward for their labour. For if they fall, the one will lift up his fellow; but woe to him that is alone when he falleth; for he hath not another to help him up. Again, if two lie together, then they have heat: but how can one be warm alone? And if one prevail against him, two shall not withstand him; and a threefold cord is not quickly broken.” Although Solomon speaks of the everyday, he explains that these simple aspects of life are improved by companions. The last portion of this passage talks about “a threefold cord.” Perhaps Solomon is explaining that one can never have too any friends! C. S. Lewis, again in Four Loves, suggest that friendship is one relationship that always wants to add to it. He argues, “The first two would be glad to find a third.” We see this friendship perhaps in Scripture with David’s mighty men or Jesus’ disciples.
Friends forgive our humbly admitted wrongs.
What a blessing is forgiveness! As was already discussed, Ephesians 4:32 explains that forgiveness should be at the core of our interactions with others, including our friends. However, when we consider the full of Scripture, we realize that we have a part in receiving forgiveness from others (which is separate from our forgiveness from God). Proverbs 6:3 explains this part we play in our own forgiveness: “Do this now, my son, and deliver thyself, when thou art come into the hand of thy friend: go, humble thyself, and make sure thy friend.” Humility is required to admit mistakes and to restore friendship when we have gone astray. Humility helps strengthen friendship in many ways.
I am so thankful for the variety of friends I have had that have played these roles in my life, and even more thankful for the mother who told me early on that these relationships would be invaluable.
Recent Comments